Still hiding out? Me too

I'll be honest, though. This doesn't actually bother me.

I'm so very very VERY introverted that being ordered from a government level to stay home seems like finally, someone is thinking of ME FIRST!!

I get what little outside contact I care to have through the internet and I'm completely okay with that.

I had to go out on Friday to drop off my laptop. I'm officially unemployed now.

But I haven't opened the door since then, and I'm okay with that.

I have to go out on Tuesday to go to the chiropractor, since it is the last day I have healthcare. I'm less okay with not having healthcare coverage, and I'm not super thrilled with having to go out... but it's just a quick charge out, and since I have to be out anyway, I'll stop at the store on the way home and pick up a couple of things that I need to get.

I'd actually be really happy working remotely all the time. I would need to get a new place to live so that I could have an actual OFFICE in my house, but you know... baby steps. :)

I did toy with the idea of going out on my patio today. But there were people out there being stupid (apparently a couple of families decided that the quarantine orders didn't apply to THEM and they were having a bit of a block party. I won't go into my thoughts on that.)

So I stayed in and did some small chores.

I now have bread dough rising in the fridge, half the dishes are done, sourdough starter is fed up so that I can make pizza dough tomorrow, and I'll start gathering up recycling tomorrow to go out. It will work out.

And if I time it right, I won't have to run into anyone tomorrow either!

How are you holding up?

I admit, I'm one of those introverts who honestly a) hasn't changed my lifestyle all that much from normal now that I'm being told to stay home, and b) might possibly be thrilled that FINALLY I don't have to JUSTIFY staying away from other people.

In other news, I'm quitting my job.

I do have another job lined up and the new offer is absolutely AMAZING. It is a job that will allow me to really grow, stretch my skills, and become a better investment for companies by orders of magnitude.

I'm letting specific people at my current job know. Today I told the VP of Marketing, and she is the first and only person to ask if there was any chance of me being talked out of leaving, and when the answer to that was negative, she was unhappy that the quarantining means that she and others can't take me out to lunch before I leave.

The only person that has asked me to stay and wanted to celebrate me before I leave.

I started to cry.

But that's the exact reason why I have to leave. Because there should have been others who at least wanted to celebrate with me before I left. At least expressed the desire, given the current circumstances.

A friend and I took another coworker out to lunch when she was leaving. Her department took her out to lunch as well. Heck, order me a small bouquet of flowers or something, since we can't do lunch, but acknowledge me!

Well, that didn't work

I don't know what happened there, but my last two posts ended up disappearing before they even posted.

Well, then I'll just post a little blurb now and a bigger blurb on another day.

Are you staying healthy? Are you worried about the covid-19? Are you stocking up on toilet paper?

The people around here are going bonkers. They've practically cleaned out a few different Costcos... COSTCO... the WAREHOUSE STORE. Where you buy a lifetime supply of toilet paper and need a truck to haul it all home.

Yeah, people have cleaned out most of the Costcos around here. Not just of things like food, but people are literally FIGHTING OVER TOILET PAPER...

Seriously? WHY? It's toilet paper. It's not an absolute necessity of life. But there it is.

I managed to catch a nasty nasty cold.

But I know it is just a cold. I'm over it now, but I still have a cough that is lingering because of all the irritation to the lining of my throat from when I was actually sick.

I'll be glad when the cough finally goes away.

I don't think this has ever happened before!

We're not even out of February and my taxes are filed...

Maybe I'm ill... ;)

Tonight was taxes and guitar practice (I must get better about practicing more regularly!) Tomorrow will be working on editing after I put the bird to bed. I had planned to do some tonight, but it's late and I would like to get more than 4 hours of sleep tonight.

I should also spend time this week putting the last touches on the (very late) birthday gift for my nephew and get it mailed. I'll get there. There are just too many things to do, not enough money to get them all done, and I'm exhausted.

Do you ever remember your dreams?

Do you think about what they might mean?

I was thinking about this concept this week because earlier in the week I had a dream that was decidedly odd, probably not one that would be considered restful. :)

In the dream, I was sitting on a couch with some other people in the same room and we were all discussing story plot lines. The main storyline was the basic "evil mastermind controlling others to do whatever nefarious plans he had". The discussion revolved around how to demonstrate the pure evilness of the evil mastermind.

The person who was set to portray the evil mastermind was standing behind me and had asked a question. I think, something about taking a hostage...? I turned my head as far as I could to talk to him, but that ended up meaning that I was practically looking at him upside down, which seemed silly (even in a dream...)

So I got onto my knees on the couch and turned to face him. I explained my idea on the hostage idea, which was basically that he needed to take someone unassociated with the scene and hold THAT person hostage. We discussed particulars, and somehow I ended up being the one who would be the "innocent bystander" (laughable idea, I am far more likely to be in league with someone... :)

But, that part of the discussion ended up with discussion the best way to display evilness with an "innocent". I described that as a control idea, you needed to take away the power of the hostage, so the best option would be to hold the person off the ground like Antaeus. This would then remove even the option to get away from the hostage. So the evil mastermind actor proceeded to offer a couple of suggestions, and I countered. It ended up with him literally pulling me to my feet with a hand around my throat. (This was the option that was decided on at the end of the whole discussion, but that the innocent person would actually be fully lifted up by the throat, thereby displaying full helplessness. And can I say, even in dreamland it was so nice to be around other people who actually knew the story of Antaeus!)

The dream stuck around in my mind because of the fact that I know myself well enough to know that I don't like giving up control of projects that I'm working on. I can share, to an extent with others, but I can have trouble with giving up control. That's not to say that I always need to be in control, but if I start in control of something, it is offensive to me to have that control taken away without a reason that I can agree with (thereby making the giving up of control my choice).

So why, in this dream, am I not just able to share control of this story planning, but even allow someone else to have so much control of me physically, that they can hold me by the throat?

Yes, I'm aware that it was a dream. I was even moderately aware at the time that I was dreaming. That doesn't change my personality, I still have all the same character flaws and strengths, so why was this okay?

Right now, my current thought path is that in the dream I knew this actor well. I'd worked with or around him for years and had trust in the fact that he knew his business well enough that I was safe in giving up that control and, more immediately, I wasn't giving up control permanently. Therefore, if I know that I'm being treated like a partner and cared for (not in any sexual or intimate way, but as a treasured partner/friend/coworker/etc), then I can better share whatever I'm working on and I can reciprocate the trust.

I had to learn the control part very early. My mother was a single mom pretty early on and even when she wasn't, I ended up being the one to take care of a lot of the animals in the house and then my siblings, when they arrived. Just because I've always had to be responsible for most of the things around me doesn't mean I shouldn't be able to let others in to help.

How do you share? What makes you happy to share projects with friends, coworkers, or family?

Random book musings

Do you have a favorite book genre and/or author?

I'll read almost anything that isn't nailed down, although romance novels are not my favorite genre. I'll try to be fair, they've gotten better over the last few years. There are fewer of the heaving bosom maidens who squeak and faint and languish while waiting for a Man to save them.

I loathe those characters. I've read a few books classified as "romance" that I was entertained by. The series that has a sense of humour, both about the genre and itself... good bet that I'll at least read it through. Well thought-out vampires or werewolves will likely get a read as well. I said WELL WRITTEN. Twilight is crap. Fifty shades of crap is worse. I have strong opinions about both lines of crap and their authors.

I enjoy Fantasy books quite a bit, and I like non-fiction often, depending on the subject.

A few months back I finally got my hands on a copy of a book about the making of the movie The Lost Boys. That book is HARD to find. Not really hard to "find", but hard to find as available to purchase. My copy came from Texas and cost me a pretty penny. Several pretty pennies. Many several.

I buy books often for my nephew... he doesn't read yet. But when he starts, I've gotten him the solid start of his own library!

I was browsing Amazon today, looking to see if I had any missing books in a couple of series... Nope. Turns out, I bought all of them a while ago... and pre-ordered the one coming out in March, back in August...

Guess I like that author.

Do you like to read? What are you reading?

Did you know about this thing called Television?

I know, it's actually been a thing for ages...

I cut out most TV while I was in school! Then, right when I was getting back into TV... I went back to school for a new certification.

So it's been over SIX WHOLE YEARS since I really got to watch much TV. (To be honest, I didn't miss much of it.)

I regret that I can't easily watch the new Good Eats show on Food Network, but that's about it. Most of the rest of the shows that I loved were cancelled before I stopped watching TV.

In other news, are you watching Disney+? I got a subscription as part of my holiday present for the silly bird girl. That way we can watch more Disney movies and it will cost less than me buying them all.

Not only that, but I get to watch The Mandalorian. My word, SO GOOD. I have one episode left of the first season, and I'm dragging my feet. I don't want to be finished with the first season!

I also signed up for CuriosityStream. That one is a lot like Netflix, but it's all Science-y stuff. Which I very much enjoy. I really do wish that they would have a "Play All" option, though. Some of their shows are short videos in a collection. Say 5 10-minute videos. It's a little annoying to have to select each one individually to be played. But oh well, for roughly $13 for a year, I'll live with some extra clicking.

What are you watching?